Sometimes being sensitive and anxious wears at me. Yawn. It's like I get my feelings hurt and now I'm going to worry about why I do. Then obsess about learning to not be sensitive. Followed by worrying about worrying. Then getting angry because I'm wasting time thinking about it. Then trying not to. Try to clear my thoughts. Meditate….can't. Think white blank paper…oh no, it's lined. Damn lines. It's college ruled. My kids are in elementary school. I need wide rules. Wait! No lines…blank paper. Meditate. This isn't working. Ok. Ok. Eyes closed. Blue cloudless sky. Clear blue. Just blue. Blue. Nothing. Blue. Small cloud. Wait! Get out of my head cloud. Blue cloud. I can't believe he said that. Ugh. Forget it. Surrender to who I am…🙄big eye rolling moments. I wonder if it would be cool to not give a shit and never give anything a second thought. Like if someone said you don't deserve anything you have and that they are going to take it from you and leave you alone with nothing…. I could shrug my shoulders and walk away. Ten steps later I forgot what was said and I'm doing something else. LIFE GOALS! Seriously I want to be the shrug it off chick 🤷🏼♀️.
Shruggy McChuggy 🤷🏼♀️🍻. Living life with an ehhh whatever attitude…then forgetting whatever she was ehh-ing.
Maybe I just want to be oblivious like one of those people that don't get jokes or funny sarcasm. I could walk around all the time saying, "I don't get it." Those people don't have anxiety or sensitivities…do they? I could be like that you tube video of the girl who's boyfriend asks her crazy questions and she gets pissed when he laughs at her. The, would you want your large pizza sliced into 8 pieces or 12 pieces and say 8 because I can't eat 12. Haha. Yes, I'll be like that. Space cadet.